Adoption is a subject that can be associated with negative stereotypes and misconceptions. Too often the public’s idea of adoption is linked to horror stories, uncertainty and inaccurate information, causing many families to stray away from building and growing their family through adoption.
Below are five misconceptions/myths that we debunked for you:
Adoption should be kept a secret
American history stigmatized adoption as secretive because women who were placing their children – were usually younger and had their children out of wedlock. Today, openness about adoption is encouraged and preferred by many birth parents, adoptive families and adoptees. With open adoption, adoptees have a deeper understanding of who their adoption story – and why their birth parents chose adoption. Secrets are something that you are ashamed of, and your child’s story and background is something that should be embraced and talked about even the difficult parts. Adoption openness also allows birth parents to see that their children are thriving and well cared for.
You have to have a lot of money to adopt
Adopting a child does require fees and other costs, however, you do not have to be filthy rich to pursue adoption. There are many different approaches someone could take when trying to finance adoption. Organizations like helpusadopt.org provide qualified families with grants up to $15,000 – and other companies like; resources4adoption.com is an online resource for adoptive families seeking up-to-date information on adoption grants and loans and how to qualify for them.
A birth parent or other birth relative can take a child back even after the adoption is complete
After a baby is born and placed with an adoptive family, the birth parents have a determined amount of time to revoke their consent, in accordance with state laws. After the revocation period has expired, birth parents cannot change their minds, birth parents are not able to legally regain parental rights. Finalization is the legal process, in which an attorney represents the family and presents the case to the judge – the judge then makes the adoptive parents the legal and permanent parent of the adoptee. After finalization consent is irrevocable.
Birth parents are always teen mothers
Birth mothers are often women in their twenties and already parenting other children. They often choose adoption, because they are single-mothers and struggling. They are choosing adoption, because they want a better life for their child – and they usually want to play an active role in their child’s adoption plan and choosing adoptive parents.
You cannot love adopted children the same as if they were biological
Most adoptive parents say the love between them and their child arrived instantly, while for others it grew over time. Regardless, the connection between adoptive parents and adopted children are as organic, genuine and strong as they are between any biological children and biological parents.