March is National Social Work month and we sat down with some of the Adoptions From The Heart social workers to learn more about what they do and why they do it.
Educating the Community
In the social work world there is no normal day, but there are things that AFTH social workers try and accomplish in any given week. To help spread the word about all the services AFTH provides and the good that the agency does in the community, social workers try and build relationships with outreach locations. An enhanced personal relationship with fellow social workers and healthcare providers means even more people learn about open adoption and Adoptions From The Heart. Other ways that women and families learn about open adoption is through free informational meetings and the educational courses that the agency’s social workers host every month.
Meeting with Expecting Parents
Typical isn’t an adjective social workers would use to describe meetings with expecting parents because every situation is so different. Sometimes placements are of the emergency variety and a mother hasn’t chosen a prospective adoptive family before the baby’s birth and social workers have to move through the process at an accelerated rate.
Regardless of how long AFTH social workers have with the expecting mothers, the women always reach out to them first. “This whole process is in your control. You decide when and where things happen,” explained Hannah, an AFTH social worker, about the time spent with expecting mothers.
Taking Steps with Adoptive Parents
When AFTH social workers set up their approximately ninety minute pre-adoption counseling session, the focus is to get to know each other, talk about expectations for the adoption journey and go over the next steps in the process. Whether they are teaching an educational course, child care class, hosting any of two home study groups, in the middle of the post placement process, or updating a home study well after placement, the Adoptions From The Heart social workers guide adoptive parents through their adoption journey.
No Day Looks the Same
Saying no day looks the same is an understatement. There are days when all the things explained above are going on at once and at any given moment social workers could get a call from a hospital for a placement. Sometimes every social worker in a particular office is busy and appointments have to be shuffled around, but there is a reason hospitals call AFTH—when a social worker answers the call, they say they will be there within the hour and off they go. Social workers are dedicated to what they do and maintain positive and professional demeanor even when they get thrown curve balls.
Difficult and Emotional Situations
Question: Do you worry? Answer: Yes.
Question: Does it take a personal toll? Answer: Yes.
“We have to be non-judgmental. When we are with an expecting mother we are there and we are there to be their advocate no matter what, “explained Sam, an AFTH social worker. “Yes, sometimes we deal with heavy information and it is stressful, but we are prepared for these things. There is a reason we are social workers, we can handle anything that gets thrown in our direction.”
Open adoption is a positive thing, but it is heartbreaking loss too and as social workers, they see the happiness and the sadness. Hannah explained:
“There are birthmothers who are homeless and need a rehab or mental health service and you try and find something and sometimes you can’t find it. When you are emotional invested in this person you want them to be okay. To know I was going home to my apartment and she was on the street, that just isn’t fair, I should be able to do more for her. It keeps me up at night, thinking I could have overlooked something. I want to do more. What is my purpose as a social worker if I can’t help her?”
When social workers have to disappoint or disrupt an adoptive family it is another emotional moment. “I just think, I can’t believe I have to do this to this person. I would do anything to not have to make that call, but at the same time I don’t want anyone else to make it, I’m the one who has the relationship with the family,” Ashley, AFTH’s Wynnewood District Supervisor, explained. She continued, “We get so invested in these people’s lives. We celebrate when an adoptive family gets a placement and grieve when birthmother’s experience a loss. We take things home with us and care as if they are family.”
What does it take to be a good social worker?
“Anyone in the social work field wants to help people, make their lives happier, easier, and better. I am a people person.” – Sam
“I like being around people, talking with people. We give support to someone during the most difficult part of their life or the happiest time in their life, and it’s exciting. Even if it feels like we didn’t make a difference, I know we did.” – Hannah
“I feel lucky to have social work job that lets me see so many happy endings. Even when birth parents are going through a difficult experience knowing that it is their choice and they are doing it to better their lives and the life of their child is a very powerful thing. One birthmother is such an inspiration to me. She tells me all the time what a positive experience this has been, that she is thankful she made an adoption plan.” – Ashley
