Friends through Adoption become Family through Kidney Transplant
Earlier this year, AFTH received an email from a family who had adopted through our China Program over ten years ago. Marie Kilgore and her family had a wonderful experience and were enjoying the past ten years with their daughter, Grace.
However, they reached out to us because their adoption story involved more than just their daughter. It involved many other families too. Families they had met who were adopting through the same program and traveling to China at the same time. One such family included mother Liz Smith, who became close friends with Marie. These families reached out to AFTH to not only share their adoption journeys, but their journey through life and friendship together, especially this past year, when Liz donated her Kidney to Marie.
The two women wanted to share their story to show the importance of adoption as well as living donors. These were two topics that Marie and Liz both wanted to advocate for, and AFTH was honored to be asked to help them do it.
Liz and Marie’s lives began far apart when they first met. As prospective adoptive parents, Liz and her husband were working with AFTH through our Virginia Office. Marie and her husband were hoping to adopt as well, but working with our Wynnewood, PA office. They initially met over a chat room for parents traveling to China in the same group to bring home their children. After meeting face-to-face on their trip, the two families became fast friends. Despite living far apart, they continued their friendship after returning to the states. Their daughters grew up as close friends. Lili, Liz’s daughter, was especially caring for Grace and her difficulties with Epilepsy. Even now, when Liz’s family has relocated to California, the families have stayed close, not only with each other, but with other families from the trip.
A few of the families from the trip went on a vacation together a couple years back, including Liz and Marie’s families. At one point of the trip, Marie broke the news that she was having kidney issues and would eventually need a transplant. Liz immediately stepped up and offered to donate. So quickly, in fact, that Marie almost thought she was joking! Marie’s husband was due to be her donor, so for the time, the kind proposition was put aside.
However, some months later, Marie and her husband found that he was not a match for the transplant. Marie called Liz, wondering if she really meant the incredible gesture at their vacation. Of course, Liz did mean it. She was a match and they were set for surgery.
In August of 2016, the two ladies had their surgery at UPenn Hospital. Despite some initial complications, all has been going smoothly since. Liz is now back in California with her loving family who happily help her with laundry, heavy lifting, and other tasks. Marie is also recovering with the tender, love, and care of her family and friends.
These two women understand each other in a way no one else can. Not only have they shared the experiences of international adoption and raising a child from adoption, but they have also shared their lives together, physically, emotionally, and mentally. They are more than friends now. They declare they are sisters. AFTH is so thrilled to see such a loving and happy connection brought onby adoption. We thank Liz and Marie for sharing their story with us and allowing us to share it with you. See coverage of this piece in USA Today’s Humankind section, here.