Open Adoption: noun: an adoption plan that involves contact between biological and adoptive parents and sometimes between biological parents and the adopted child.
Unplanned Pregnancy
Decades ago if a woman facing an unplanned pregnancy did not want to marry the man who impregnated her, giving baby up for adoption was her only option. Pregnant women were living somewhere else in secrecy for nine months out of fear that someone would see them. Expecting and birth fathers were often ignored in the scenario. “The original fathers were irrelevant, obstacles, and annoyances; their parental rights were even less legally protected than they are today,” said Dr. Deborah H. Siegel within her article titled “Adoption Trends Today.”
If the birth mom ever met her child it was for a split second after delivering her baby. The hospital discouraged birth parents from even looking at their baby out of fear they would become attached. The birth parents left the hospital empty-handed and trying to cope with the devastating loss they just experienced. Birth parents were out there missing their children every day and wondering if their child (the adoptee) knew they existed. There was certainly no education or knowledge about open adoptions.
In the 1970s research was released proving that openness amongst members of the adoption triad was what is best for everyone. Adoptions From The Heart Founder/CEO and fellow adoptee Maxine Chalker is an integral figure in the open adoption movement. In 1985 Maxine opened “The Adoption Agency” as one of the first open adoption agencies in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Delaware. In 1994 “The Adoption Agency” became Adoptions From The Heart.
AFTH is has been a big advocate for open adoption for the past 33 years. An open relationship benefits everyone in the adoption triad starting with the child.
“The child has the ability to more fully incorporate their identity as they have all the pieces to the puzzle. Their biology from their birth parents and their upbringing with their adoptive parents,” said Ashley Kodet, AFTH’s Domestic Program Manager Not having constantly think over the question “Who do I look like?” makes a difference.
Dr. Deborah H. Siegel, Ph.D. Professor in the school of social work found within her studies about adoption that most young adult adoptees (Ages 18 to 23), preferred knowing their birth parents over not knowing them.
Adoptive Parents
For adoptive parents, having open communication with their child’s birth parents not only gives you answers to questions your child may have one day, but also access to vital medical information. It is important for the adoptee to know their medical information. “When Adoptees Uncover Their Medical History” published in the U.S. News & World Report is a great article for prospective adoptive parents to read.
While many prospective adoptive parents may fear that an open adoption relationship essentially opens the door for family disruption; studies have also shown that this rarely the case. The outcome of the Minnesota/Texas Adoption Research Project revealed that when compared to families in a confidential adoption agreement, families who established an open adoption agreement reported higher levels of empathy towards the birth mothers, acknowledgment of the child’s adoption, and less fear that the birth mother might change her mind and try to reclaim the child.
Sometimes prospective adoptive parents think it is too painful for a birth mother to watch someone else raising their child. In terms of birth parent grief, studies showed from the Minnesota/Texas Adoption Research Project that birth mothers who opt for open adoption plans have in fact lower adoption-related grief and loss than those who chose a closed adoption.
“Contrary to popular belief, the VAST majority of birth mothers love their children deeply. They chose adoption to give them the best life possible, not because they don’t want them. Placing a child for adoption is a heartbreaking loss and open adoption helps with this. Being able to have a relationship with your child, even if it’s not the role of a parent is incredibly healing,” said Annaleece Merrill, a fellow birth mother, and contributor for Adoptions.com.
An open adoption agreement has the potential to grow into a relationship. A relationship with lots of understanding, acknowledgment, and love between the members of the adoption triad.
Check out our website for more information about open adoption.
Did you search: “how to put a baby up for adoption”, you are in the right place.
