Sometimes birth fathers feel like they are forgotten about. Which is why we would like to highlight an AFTH birth father and his role in the adoption process. We had the opportunity to speak with BJ to learn more about his journey. BJ and the birth mother Nicole began working with AFTH in May 2016, and placed their son in July 2016. BJ joined AFTH for a Birth Parent Panel last April, where prospective adoptive parents inquired about what he and his partner looked for in an adoptive parent.
Q: How was the process of placing your child up for adoption and making an adoption plan?
BJ: Really good, Michaelina was awesome and helped us every step of the way. She made it easier for us to understand and love the decision we had made.
Q: Was the searching and researching part hectic for you? Did you find that you needed more help than you had thought?
BJ: Nicole was the one who chose this, I was very comfortable with the decision and supportive throughout the process.
Q: How is your open adoption relationship with your child and adoptive parents now after the adoption?
BJ: Our relationship is great! We are very close to with the adoptive parents. We see them at least once a month. Very genuine people.
Q: How did this effect your relationship with Nicole?
BJ: I am still with Nicole. We are doing great, it affected us a little because we were not financially prepared. The environment we lived in was hard and caused it to be difficult to overcome but we overcome it and are going strong.
Q: Family support?
BJ: My dad was great and super supportive. Nicole’s family wasn’t as supportive and didn’t agree with our choice so it was difficult and upsetting when going through this process.
Q: How did you pick the family?
BJ: I had searched a lot of people and based it on their bios online. The couple we had decided had a little girl named Kira which caught our eyes instantly. She looked so happy in pictures and it was nice to know they had adopted before.
Q: Anything you’d like to tell me? Advice? Questions you still have?
BJ: A lot of adoptive parents don’t think you need to keep contact but that’s the best thing that you could do. Since we kept in contact we have awesome parents taking care of Kyle and allows visitations whenever.